What’s a college intern stuffed in a furry suit on a 99° day have to do with baseball? Nothing.
What does a sensitive horse chestnut with a human body and a striped shirt have to do with college football? Also nothing.
And finally, what does an anarchy-loving nudist orange blob have to do with hockey? Unfortunately, the answer here is nothing either.
The mascots are an almost impossible oddity to explain. Why do sports teams have these ridiculous creatures prowling the stands, snapping pictures with drunken fans and creepy young kids? Nobody knows and honestly, I’m not sure we have the mental strength to understand the reasoning if we were to learn it.
Despite their mystifying existence, mascots can be a lot of fun. Who doesn’t want to see a gorilla throwing a basketball? Or a big green, uh, something that rides an ATV and fights with an octogenarian? There’s something so silly about a mascot that we can’t help but love them.
Of course, it’s impossible to talk about mascot tattoos without mentioning the one and only Gritty. The orange story is something that could only happen in Philadelphia. For eons, the Phillie Phanatic has ruled Philadelphia as its one and only mascot. Then the local hockey team, the Flyers, decided to introduce competition to the city of brotherly love by creating their own. To say Gritty was met with derision would be the understatement of the century. Reactions ranged from “Oh my God, what the hell is that thing?” to “Kill him with fire, it’s horrible!” There really was no middle ground, the entire nation was appalled.
This is where something interesting happened. Everyone in Philadelphia, and I mean literally everyone, changed their minds in an instant and fell in love with Gritty. They started defending Gritty with every ounce of their being. In their eyes, the world had come to kick Philadelphia in the ass once more and they had to defend their beautiful orange blob. It pains me to admit it, they were right, Gritty is wonderful.
Gritty is also the most tattooed mascot. And honestly, it’s not even close. There are so many gritty tattoos out there. He governs so much. So let’s start with a special tribute section to the mighty Gritty before continuing with more mascot tattoos.
We could have done the whole article with nothing but the tattoos of the nightmarish orange-haired anti-hero from Philadelphia, but that seems unfair.